Current Ramblings
Thursday, September 25, 2008
Sir Mix-A-Lot Wouldn't Approve
I've been putting on weight.
As best as I can recall, it really started when I was on the road to recovery after my ulcerative colitis first really hit me. I lost some weight from being sick, and after I gained it back I just kept slowly gaining more. I wondered if it was just that I had always had something wrong with my digestive tract, and now that it was being properly treated I was actually absorbing all the crap I ate. Or maybe it started a little before that. It's been a while. I've also blamed it on going from a physically active job to a sedentary one, which is also something that's too pat and convenient an answer as it started creeping up before I left Half Price Books. I can't blame WoW like so many likely would, because before I spent all my free time in front of the computer playing that I spent all my free time in front of my computer chatting on IRC. Probably the truest culprit is age. My father was also a stick of a person until his late 20s or so.
It's just that the last year or so it seems to have gotten worse.
Part of me has always believed my own body at least would be the weight it wanted to be. I have always tended to have a very stable weight, and short of illness it's rarely moved dramatically. So part of me considers this to be, to a certain point, something that there's no use fighting against. I used to be thin, and that plus 50 pounds is still not exactly obese. It's just, you know, womanly. Andrew is only bothered in that it seems to bother me; he shows me every day that he, at least, thinks I'm attractive, and that's extremely important. I tend to compare myself more with geek women than any more mainstream standard, and we aren't known to be a skinny lot. And there's always that futurist idea that our bodies will atrophy when our minds take over anyway.
But I'm outgrowing my collection of witty T-shirts. Sometimes I'm content with myself and sometimes I'm not, the latter usually when I'm realizing something I used to love to wear can no longer be wrapped around my expanding thighs. Dieting for me is a joke: a lifetime of having a metabolism able to overcome whatever greasy garbage I felt like eating has gotten me too accustomed to not caring, though at least the aforementioned digestive problems keep my portions reasonable. I messed with WiiFit for a month and was just discouraged at the slow creep my weight is showing.
As of yesterday morning - the morning after I wrote the first draft of this post, actually - I started getting my rear out of bed half an hour early to walk around the block like I used to. It's nice in the morning this time of year, a little colder than I like but it warms up as you go. I don't know if I'll be able to keep to this schedule once winter creeps in, but I could probably talk Andrew into not having dinner waiting when I get home (Though who can really argue with that?) so I can do it when I get home. Next week I'll probably start using the WiiFit again, at least to keep track of things. Crossing my fingers that it helps.
posted@1:07 PM by:Trixter: 0 comments
